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Blood helped. It floods the negativity and pain out. For somemoments at least. She thought about it a lot. She thought about cuttingagain all the time and there were moments it was hard not doing it.In her mind, the fresh razor blade carved through her skin several times.Like a warm knife through butter. Blood drops formed and ran down thearm. Dropped to the floor, leaving red sprinkles on the white tiledbathroom floor. She would just sit there and watch the blood. Smearingthe blood along the. ' 'who knows?' i replied. I couldn't believe where this was going, i was going to some woman's house who i'd only just met and she was hinting that she was wanting to have sex with me or whatever lesbians do. Pulling into the drive i asked whether i should leave my stuff in the car, to which she said yeah, 'i'll drop you off home if you want later, but it is the weekend so you could stay over if things go well.' I wasn't sure whether or not to be freaked out by this or happy because let's be. Almost, but not quite formal, she thought, and after several long glances at her reflection in the mirror, she nodded with some satisfaction, spritzed some Opium on her wrists, rubbing them together to dissipate the scent. She searched through three different handbags until she found the lipstick she was looking for: a dark, matte plum shade that made her look more exotic than she felt. As she arrived at the party, Laura tried to quell the thoughts — more like fantasies — that raced through. It’s not going anywhere.”“Sorry. It’s so good! Do you make this often?”“It was Claire’s favorite when she was a kid but nowadays I only make it if she’s home.”“Oh, okay. I could eat this every day, honestly.”“Maybe you can, if you stay.”Alex looked up at me.“Maybe.” Alex gave me a subtle wink.There she goes again. Damn, she sure knows how to get me going.“Well, now that you’re staying over, you can sleep in Claire’s room if you’d like. Are you tired?”“Not really.”“Good. I was thinking about.
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